Last night, I had a series of dreams that was probably the weirdest dream ever. I kept waking up and falling back asleep into the same dream, or — what seemed at the time at least — the next scene in the dream.
First, I was driving, but couldn’t drive through the deep, narrow gorge because, during the July derecho, a tree at least 200-feet tall had fallen into the gorge and was wedged almost the whole length of the gorge blocking it. We managed to get the Jeep far enough down the length of the gorge that I could drive over the top few limbs, but then the gorge was blocked by a landslide. Woke up and fell back asleep on the other side of the gorge.
Everyone thought the psychotic serial killer was getting better, which was why he was allowed more freedom at the hospital visits. But then he’d slip back into his killer personality and was trying to kill me. Woke myself up from that one pretty quick. Everyone knows nothing good comes from getting killed in your dream by a serial killer. And I woke up pretty scared. That was one of the really intense parts of the dream.
So I fell back asleep thinking I should make a movie based on that serial killer. Since it scared me so much, it’d make a great horror film. The problem was that my movie’s star kept slipping too much into the serial killer role and was trying to kill me. Woke up and fell back into that dream a few times.
The next part is a little hazy. It involved a house at the beach, my sister’s house, and the house next door where a random Facebook friend was training for a marathon while also storing raw chicken necks on his front porch. Then we left his house and ended up in my parents yard where I was attacked by a giant bald eagle who kept pecking at me while a fox (the small, brown, woodland creature) with a face that reminded me of Antonio Banderas napped nearby on the pillow it had carried out of the woods.
What do you think it could mean?
One of the biggest problems with trying to date in DC is that everyone’s busy. Busy with work. Busy with school. Busy with social lives and current friends. I’ve recently had two experiences that have reminded me of this.
A few weeks ago, I started emailing with a guy on OkCupid. After a few messages there, he gave me his email as an easier way to continue our conversation. The email looked familiar. I checked my Gmail and sure enough, we had chatted before.
About 2.5 years ago, we met on Match.com. We had chatted for a while, and then moved the conversation to Gmail, where we spent several weeks trying to arrange our first date. It never happened because of work schedules, and other events. And then I started dating someone and we lost touch.
Now that we’d reconnected, we finally went out. The first date was nice. On the second date, I don’t think either one of us was feeling the magic. But, it took about 2.5 years from when we first met to find that out.
I met Guy #2 in January of 2009 through a mutual friend that I see occasionally. We traded information and became Facebook friends. Again, we tried scheduling a date, but conflicting calendars didn’t allow it. At some point, we stopped trying. Over the years, he’s popped up on my newsfeed and I never thought much about it, other than the fact that he’s really cute.
A few weeks ago, we ran into each other at an event, but didn’t talk. When he got home, he emailed me on Facebook and asked if I had been at the event. We chatted until a few hours past my bedtime, and set up a date for the next Friday.
It was a really nice first date. And it only took 3.5 years to happen.
Is there a solution?
If you’re single, you can’t spend all your time cruising bars and dating websites trying to meet people. But, it is so easy in DC to get caught up in all the activities of a busy urban life. So how do you resolve the conflict between wanting to meet someone and our current social lives? When you’re loving your life (and hopefully your job), how do you make sure you’re making space and time to let someone else in?
And how weird is Fate that it reconnected me with two guys within a month?
Would love to hear your comments below.
Today was the first day of my 2nd semester of law school.
Last night, I started packing for today. Last semester, I had a solid routine down. I packed my bag the night before, including my change of clothes if I was planning on showering at work. I had gotten in the habit of knowing which books I needed which night, and what nights I needed to pack my computer, without having to think about it. But, after only 3 1/2 weeks away from the routine, I felt like I was starting from scratch. It seemed to require a lot of effort to go through my checklist:
- Computer: yes – going to try to take all my notes electronically
- Notebooks: no – See above. Ok, maybe one, just in case I need paper to write on
- Pens: Two
- Casebook: Yes
- Other 5 books for Civil Procedure: No
- Books for Rhetoric: (Didn’t even cross my mind.)
Starting to put it all in my bag, and feeling myself get back in that rhythm, reminded me just how tired I was last semester. And how much of a rut I felt like I was in during the semester. A little part of me wondered if I could do it again. I was SO tired by the end of the semester. People kept saying, “I don’t know how you do it.” Might as well ask, “How do you eat an elephant?” The answer’s the same: “One bite at a time.” Just focus on the next step. The next day. The next writing assignment. Don’t look too far ahead or you lose hope and fell overcome by despair.
But, better to not spend time exploring that feeling, and just put my head down and go forward. One bite at a time.
Tonight, I had Civil Procedure and Rhetoric, which is why I was packing for those classes. (At least I got that right!).
This afternoon at work, I noticed a flurry of activity on Facebook about how it was snowing in DC. (Not that I look at Facebook during work, but somehow I knew.) Then, it started snowing out in the suburbs where I work, and it was coming down pretty heavy. While it wasn’t sticking to the ground, it was covering the grass and the trees as I left work. The first week of my first semester involved a 5.8 magnitude earthquake and Hurricane Irene. This semester starts with what looked like a blizzard for a few hours. Is this a sign?
Civ Pro (saving me the trouble of typing Civil Procedure every time) wasn’t bad. The professor seems interesting and friendly. I even raised my hand to answer a question. I got it wrong. Doh #1. And, he misheard my name, and called me “John.” Doh #2.
Rhetoric was fine. It seems this semester is going to be a lot of work. Only two real assignments, but they’re both pretty big assignments. AND… I’m already behind in the reading. The Rhetoric Department uses an entirely separate electronic system to communicate with us, and I didn’t think to look there for the syllabus until this morning. Doh #3. And I learned we have two research lectures this semester. Doh #4. Maybe they will be more useful than the ones we had last semester. Maybe? Probably not. Doh #5 & #6.
At least this is a long weekend, so I have an extra day to catch up.
Contracts Grade – Day 33
It’s been 4 weeks and 5 days (33 days!), and we still don’t have our grade from last semester’s Contracts class. I’m going to start doing a daily count like a hostage situation.
Reporter speaking directly to camera: “Day 45 of ‘Contracts Grades,’ and they still haven’t been released. When will this insanity end?”
(Camera cuts to a crowd of individuals weeping loudly.)
I almost don’t care anymore. Who am I kidding? I’m an over-achiever. Of course I care.
Overall, not a bad day
Six “Doh’s,” but overall not a bad first day.
And that’s one more day closer to graduation. Only 6.98 semesters to go.
I’m an Introvert! There, I said It.
Yesterday, a friend of mine posted a link on Facebook to this article by Jonathan Rauch, called “Caring for your Introvert.” It links to several related articles including, “Introverts of the World, Unite!“, “The Introversy Continues,” and “Jonathan Rauch comments on some of the feedback he’s received for ‘Caring for Your Introvert’…” They are a great collection of article on what it means to be an introvert and how the rest of you should deal with us, to keep from driving us crazy.
I’ve known I’m an introvert since at least early medical school, but the signs go back much farther. During my first year of medical school, I took the Myers-Briggs personality inventory as part of leadership training for an organization I was involved with. I’m an INTJ, and at that point my Introvert scale was almost pegged to the extreme. We spent most of an afternoon discussing our different types, what they meant, and how we would work best together. That was when I first started understanding that introversion is not the same as shyness.
I may be a little shy at times, but introversion means other things:
- I need time by myself to recharge and re-energize, even if I can do fine in a social situation.
- Getting up and giving a presentation in front of a large crowd is less draining than a small party.
- Extroverts think out loud. Introverts think inside, and when we finally get around to saying it, you should listen. We’ve thought it out and mean exactly what we’re saying. And we may not say it again if you steamroll over us.
- You may not notice we’re an introvert, especially if you’re an extrovert who hasn’t shut up since we met.
After Admitting It, the Next Step is Accepting it.
Over the last 18 years (Yes, it’s been that long since I started medical school), I’ve gotten less introverted. My last Myers-Briggs test had the scale much closer to the middle (but still an INTJ). But, I still consider myself an introvert. The last two weekends, I spent Friday night at home, alone. I’d been out every night during the weeks, and just needed some quiet time to read, watching a movie, and not talk to anyone. I didn’t feel guilty about it. I’m an introvert. I don’t need to be out every night of every weekend.
Now, Learning to Live With It.
In, “The Introversy Continues” (see link above), several readers wrote in to discuss romantic pairing between introverts and extroverts. Been there. Done that. The last two long-term relationships I’ve been in were with extroverts. That was part of the attraction, I’ll admit. They were outgoing, so easily social, talking to anyone, anywhere. Even though I’ve admitted an introvert, I still — at times — envy the extroverts. But there was such a difference in us, that it was often a cause of friction. “Do we have to go out, again?”, “Can’t we just sit at home quietly, staring into each other’s eyes lovingly, while watching reruns of the Golden Girls?”, “Do you know everyone, here?”
From here on out, I’m looking for a guy who’s just a little extroverted. Maybe I do have a tendency to spend to many nights at home, so it’s good that someone’s encouraging me to go out. But, don’t push me too hard.
Time to get ready for work. Go on! Read the articles! We’re out there. We may blend in at first, but once your introvert-dar is working, you’ll see us. And now, you have no excuse for not treating us better.
So they posted our Fall semester class schedule today, while I was doing my hour-long commute home. Within minutes, the 1L’s (1st-year Law student) Facebook page was buzzing. I immediately logged on and got to my schedule, and …
It wasn’t that helpful. I have Contracts and Torts (which I knew) and I have class Monday through Thursday from 6-8 pm, which was expected. I also have Legal Rhetoric (Legal Writing), but that schedule is TBD. WTF? That’s the class I’m worried about. My understanding is that class will be from 8-10 pm one of the nights, but I seem to recall a rumor that we could end up with a Friday 6pm-8pm class. That would suck!
We’re supposed to be able to link directly from our schedule to the Washington College of Law bookstore and buy our books online. But, that link didn’t work. I briefly did some searching and it looks like I’m going to need at least 4 books for those two classes, but don’t know what I’ll need for Legal Rhetoric. Until they decide what session I’m in, I won’t know the instructor and what they use.
So, the schedule is posted, but didn’t really answer the questions I still had. Oh well. I guess that information will come out in a few days.
But, it is exciting that the start of school is getting closer. I’ll soon be able to buy my books, will have my reading lists, and will soon be a real law student.
God, I hope this wasn’t a mistake. 🙂